The Importance of Feeling Emotions

“This shit got me in my feelings
Gotta be real with it, yup”
Drake – In My Feelings

Why You In Your Feelings?

Everybody is always talking about
“Man get out your feelings”
“Why you in your feels”
I wanna know, why you trying to avoid your feelings?
All of us get emotional; it’s a part of the human experience. Sadness, anxiety, guilt, happiness, excitement, anger, shame, jealously, or whatever. We love to really feel the good stuff; we even boast about it to our friends. But, what about the emotions that don’t feel good?

Realization

I’ve come to the realization I avoid feeling my emotions at all cost; at least the ones that don’t feel so good. I suppress the not so good feelings I get on daily basis. When I say suppress I mean a variety of things. Suppressing by putting to the side, ignoring, or distracting myself from the experience.

Examples

  1.  Let’s say a friend does something really hurtful to me. My brain tells me that I’m hurt; my energy starts reflecting hurt because that is how I am feeling. I may sit there and shed a tear or two (max) then I’ll quickly go into denial. I’ll tell myself I don’t care, that b**** was fake anyway, then proceed to go smoke a joint and eat some good food. AHHHH Im better now; I should have never tripped in the first place.
  2. Let’s say my sister says something to me that really pisses me off. My brain tells me I’m angry; my energy starts reflecting anger because thats how Im feeling (If you’re a fire sign like me this emotion is much more intense for us). I may sit there and replay the scenario in my head a couple times (max) then proceed with distracting myself. I’ll get on instagram or youtube and scroll for hours until Ive calmed down and forgot why I was mad in the first place.
  3.  Let’s say I’m feeling insecure about something. My environment, my situation, job, physical appearance, or anything really. My brain tells me damn I’m sad or incomplete; my energy starts reflecting sadness because thats how I’m feeling. I may sit there and wallow in my sadness for a few minutes (max) then proceed to put the sadness to the side. Ill call a friend; usually a loud and upbeat person and talk to them for hours. I won’t mention to them two minutes ago I was feeling incomplete; Ill just carry on a casual conversation.

We’re The Same

Are you feeling some type a way right now? Probably because you do the same; one way or another. You might go workout for hours, go out and get drunk with friends, or catch another body. It’s all good.

The Problem

See the problem with these scenarios of putting to the side, distracting, and ignoring emotions is that we think the feelings are no longer there. But really we’ve just suppressed them. Buried them. Pushed them deep deep down in the subconscious. All the while we’re just playing ourselves. They not gone boo; they still present aye eff. One thing about energy is it never ends. Negative energy stays negative until we change it to positive energy. We attract the energy that we are. Like attracts like. Well, how can we change it to positive if we suppress it? Exactly.
Read more about energy here

Emotions Growing Stronger

All those negative energies from my negative emotions were still floating around in my energetic field. The next day would come, I’d run into a different negative emotion and suppress it again. The more days that keep going by, the stronger and stronger the negative energy in my energetic field. If you keep adding unsolved feelings; those feelings will pile up. Getting stronger and stronger. For me, since I pushed those feelings away, I didn’t even know that they were there anymore.
Somebody would eat some of my food and I would cuss them the hell out. Then later I asked myself, why am I so mad? Whats wrong with me?
Something wouldn’t go my way and I’d burst into tears like my life was falling apart. Then, later asked myself, why am I so sensitive?

A Million Little Things

GUESS WHAT!! It wasn’t that one thing that sent me spiraling downhill. It was a million little things. A million things day after day that I suppressed. I thought I got rid of but I just ignored it.

“We heel by releasing. We don’t heal by suppressing.”

(E)motion

Emotion is literally energy in motion. When we feel a certain emotion that is our energy asking us to move that emotion through our body and release it. When we suppress it; we keep it still and stuck in our energy field. Keeping negative emotion blocks other energy from free flowing. I was creating blockages within my energy. I was blocking my own blessings!!!

Get In Your Feelings!

That brings us to now: I’ve learned I have to feel my emotions. I have to sit in it. No matter how painful; sit in it. Put away my phone, put down the bag of chips, don’t hit the blunt, isolate myself, look within, and feel that shit. Sometimes I’ll cry for twenty minutes, sometimes I’ll meditate, sometimes I’ll journal, sometimes I’ll scream and hit a pillow. But every single time, I learn something. I get to the deep rooted issue of why I felt that way in the first place.
For example, my dad says something to me that really gets under my skin. I mean really rubs me the wrong way. I get mad; my energy reflects anger. Instead of distracting myself I sit in it. In silence, I journal about how I’m feeling. Suddenly (maybe even an hour later), I realize the things that bother us the most about other people are really just reflections of ourselves. If it had nothing to do with something about me, why would I be affected by it?
If someone called me tall I wouldn’t even pay it any mind because Im 5’1. If someone called me selfish, I might catch an attitude because well… I can be.
“The things that bother us about other people bother us because they remind us of something we don’t like about ourselves”
Jen Sincero – You Are A Badass
So, because I sat IN MY FEELINGS I realized that the words of my dad bothered me so much because I act that way sometimes too. He’s a leo, I’m an Aries; both fire signs. He is mirroring to me the intimidation or unsettling words that I sometimes say to other people.
“Our reality is a mirror of our thoughts, the people in our reality included”
Jen Sincero – You’re A Badass

Alchemy

Every person in our lives are teachers. Every situation we face are teaching moments.
Once I gain understanding, I can now turn that negative energy into something positive. That, my friends, is called alchemy. Thats how you grow and evolve. I now look at every emotion or situation and ask myself not “why is this happening to me?” but “What is this trying to teach me?”.
“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself”
Paulo Coelho – The Alchemist
We are all alchemists. Capable of turning darkness into light, pain into purpose, weakness into strength, and negative energy into positivity. So, next time someone asks you “Why you in your feelings?” Hit em with the “gotta be real with it, yup” (in Drakes voice).
“To make the right choices in life, you have to get in touch with your soul. To do this, you need to experience solitude. Most people are afraid of it, because in the silence you hear the truth and know the solutions.”